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Kay LeShea's avatar

Whew… this one is going in my “read again later” file.

As someone who’s rebuilt more than once, from career pivots to divorce to the slow, steady work of reimagining what “home” feels like, I know that voice they’re talking about. The one that says, “Don’t rock the boat” while the boat is literally sinking under you.

That voice isn’t your truth; it’s your conditioning, and conditioning will have you choosing safety over alignment every time. But safety without self-respect is just a softer form of stuck.

These days, when I hear myself say “I don’t know,” I stop. I ask:

Is this confusion… or is this me bracing for the cost of choosing myself?

That question has changed everything.

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Shannon D. Smith, CPTD's avatar

Yesss!!🙌🏽🙌🏽 so glad it resonated! Was there anything you wish I had included (it’ll be in the upgraded version later)

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Kay LeShea's avatar

If you’re expanding it later, I think it could be powerful to include a quick, real-world snapshot of how you catch that conditioning voice in the moment.

For example: the pause before saying yes, the physical cue you notice (tight chest, racing thoughts), or the phrase you tell yourself that interrupts the autopilot choice. Those “in the trenches” moments would make it even easier for readers to recognize their patterns as they’re happening.

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Shannon D. Smith, CPTD's avatar

Oooh that’s a great idea! Thank you

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