When Life Asks for a Different Version of You

How rebuilding confidence starts with learning to trust yourself again

Shout out to

Shellie

, who asked me to write about rebuilding confidence after a season of uncertainty.

When I moved to a new city with four kids and no safety net, my family thought I’d lost my mind. Even I had moments where fear whispered, “What if they’re right?”

But underneath all the noise, something quieter kept rising in me—a voice that simply said, go forward.

Subscribe if you want to stop outsourcing your decisions and start trusting yourself.

That was all I had.
No details, no timeline, no guarantees…just those two words repeating every time I prayed, every time I sat in silence, every time I doubted myself.

That was the first time I chose to trust my own discernment over everyone else’s advice. It felt risky and unfamiliar, because for most of my life, I’d been the “good girl”—the quiet, compliant one who waited for permission, who equated obedience with safety.

But that season demanded a different version of me.
One who didn’t need permission.
One who could hear her own voice and believe it.

Leaving wasn’t just about geography.
It was about identity.
It was the moment I realized that self-trust isn’t a skill you learn—it’s a muscle you rebuild through use.

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Rebuilding Confidence After Uncertainty

Confidence doesn’t return all at once. It is rebuilt in small choices that prove to your nervous system you’re safe in your own hands.

For me, those smaller choices started years before the move.

I had already chosen to walk away from a ten-year marriage that no longer reflected who I was becoming.

I had already stepped away from a stable career path to pursue my dream of becoming a trainer and instructional designer.

And even after that, it was in the small, daily decisions—saying no when I normally said yes, setting boundaries around my time and energy—that I started strengthening the muscle of self-trust.

Each one of those moments became practice for the big one.
By the time I made the decision to relocate, I wasn’t making it from impulse.
I was making it from history—a pattern of decisions that taught me I could listen to my own discernment and be okay.

Confidence didn’t sound like, “I’ve got this.”
It sounded more like, “I don’t know yet, but I trust myself to find out.”

And that shift—from certainty to self-trust—changed everything.

Rebuilding confidence after uncertainty isn’t about becoming more capable.
It’s about remembering that you already are.
It’s the slow reintroduction to your own resilience, one small decision at a time.

When life asks for a different version of you, it’s not punishment—it’s permission to access the next layer of your becoming.

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Questions I’d Ask My Coaching Clients

If we were working together one-on-one, here’s what I’d invite you to explore:

1. What version of you are you being asked to outgrow right now?

2. Where do you still wait for permission before taking the next step?

3. What small decisions could you make this week that build evidence you can be trusted?

4. How can you begin collecting that evidence intentionally—so you see your own growth in real time?

If you prefer growing in community, that’s what we do inside the Get Untrapped™ Live Cohort.

It’s a group coaching experience where we learn, reflect, and practice alongside others who are also rebuilding self-trust.

You get the structure and guidance you’d expect from me, plus the support of people who get it—people who are learning to listen to themselves again.

Some pair up to practice what they’re learning, others draw strength from shared stories, and everyone moves forward together.

Whether it’s 1-on-1 or a group setting, the goal is the same: to help you reconnect with your clarity, confidence, and calm—without abandoning yourself in the process.

Your Turn

Shellie’s question became this post.

What about you?

Is there a topic around decision-making, self-trust, or alignment that you’d like me to unpack next?

Leave a comment below or reply directly to this email—I read every message.

What stood out to you in this story?
Have you ever had to become a different version of yourself just to move forward?

Let’s talk about it.